For the better part of my adult life I have not had the luxury of depending on my parents. Neither my father or my mother have played a role in my transition from life at home to life on my own. I suppose this may have been that I am the oldest by a long shot, out of all their children. Or maybe it is because they themselves were still growing and learning how to navigate the adult world. Whatever the case may have been or may not have been I have been on my own. There were certainly times that I thought I was alone, but I have come to find out that I couldn't have been more wrong.
Last night, we had some friends from church to the house and they brought the most magnificent 3 course meal. Roasted hearts of romaine salad with corn, ham, blue cheese and probably some other goodness I am forgetting. Steamed clams with coconut milk rice and black beans, along with sautéed mitake mushrooms and chives. And to cap it all off a traditional Colombian arroz con leche for desert. (thats really just rice pudding but it sounds so much more wonderful in spanish :) It tasted amazing!) The point I am trying to make, by getting you all to salivate ;) , is to shed light on the wonderful friends that took the time out of their evening to come shower us with love while my husband and the boys dad is deployed. We shared such great conversation and obviously an amazing meal.
I mentioned that there have been times that I thought I was alone, but somehow I have continuously found wonderful people...beautiful human beings that I call friends but beyond that they have become my chosen family. These people have supported me when I needed it most and even when I didn't know I needed it. Last nights dinner would be a great example of a time I didn't realize I would need support. These brothers of mine came over and just lightened the load a little bit. They made me feel special, cared for and loved. What amazing feelings to be filled with after a crazy draining day.
During our conversations about life and our current situations, Hayro said something that I think will stay with me for years to come. "I have accepted the reality of it." I think that sentiment hit me like a ton of bricks. Accepting the reality of it. Whatever IT might be, I know we can all relate. That concept is so hard to actually internalize. Accepting a situation of injustice. Accepting a lose. Accepting a bad boss. Accepting whatever crap life has just dealt you.
I think that accepting the reality of IT takes such strength. And it really only happens when you can give that control up to the one that controls it all. I have never been alone. God has been with me every step of the way. I may not have been able to see Him but he has been sending me family each step of my journey. Last night was just another reminder that chosen family is so sweet and beautiful. And that, that chosen family are actually HIM. They are the little reminders that He's got me. That I have support and love surrounding me. WE are all the vessels He uses to be a light to one another.
So to all the brothers and sisters I have out there, thank you for your support and love through all the good and bad times. You are my little reminders today to be grateful for all that I have and for all that is to come.
3/21/2017 02:58:52 pm
3/24/2017 04:13:19 pm
Beautifully written, Lauren, and yes acceptance of what is, along with gratitude at the same time, is calming. It is what it is - and changing our attitudes to see that opens a window for possibilities and change. Keep up the good work - we are all proud of you and behind you. :-)
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I am a Christ follower, a wife, a mother of 3 boys and was an active duty member of the United States Air Force for 8 1/2 year. I medially retired in December 2018 from the Air Force and I know work as a Fitness and yoga instructor, I run the customer service experience for a local swim school and I am a Doula. I am also working on my Master's in social work.